Thursday, June 18, 2015

Off (but really, on) Topic

Warning. I have to rant/complain a tiny, tiiiiny bit ok? 
I really hope I don't offend anyone. Not my intention. Everyone's struggles are very personal, and we all do what we can. 

Lately I've been seeing lots of articles and blogs on how to balance training with life, which is always something I think most of us are trying to figure out. I know I am! I have 3 kids, a busy husband, work full time with a long commute and have a big house that is sadly not self cleaning. And holy laundry, batman! And before you ask, yes my husband and I are equal in household duties so it's not like he leaves everyone for me to do. He does most of the housework, and I still feel overwhelmed. So much dust and dirty clothes ugh. So yes, I appreciate any advice or even simply empathizing of the situation. It's tough, but it's life and we just have to do the best we can given what we've got, you know? I want to see how other real life people handle/juggle their lives - family, work, training - all of it.

But the thing about it is, the articles and blog posts I end up reading are unrelatable to me. A good handful of the blog posts about balancing life and training are written by SAHMs or bloggers, neither of whom (I assume, so call me out of I'm wrong) have a 6am train to catch or an hour long commute. I've seen the hashtag #5amworkoutclub, and I laugh. 5am is my work wake up call, so if I want to fit in a good treadmill run (too dark to run outside) I am more part of the #4amwakeupcall, which frankly is ungodly. 

Look, I'm not saying blogging is not a real job. All jobs are real. 

Except being a circus clown. That shouldn't be real because it's creepy! 

So....

Well. there is really no easy transition here so, anyways!

I've been a SAHM to 3 kids ages 4 and under! That shit is straight hard. Being a stay at home parent is Real, yo. I've worked part time. I've worked full time. I feel like I've done it all, except own my own business, which will not be happening anytime soon).  I mean, blogging sounds like hard work, keeping up with the demands of the ever evolving faces of social media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, I am forgetting like ten more...?!) but when bloggers who work from home and travel mostly on the dime of sponsors, try and tell me how best to balance my life, I just.. can't. I stop reading. Because that advice is great for that particular situation. But what about those of us with actual bosses who want to see is working diligently in front of our computers, for the large corporation who is paying my health insurance. Those who can't jump on a treadmill or push play when the kids are taking a nap or at school. But when I see people making excuses of being too tired or worn out from the kids to fit in a workout or make a meal, my eyeballs hurt from the eye rolling. Because at least they have the choice. Ok, to be fair, there are days when your kids run you ragged and you really do not have the energy to do one more thing. I have been there as well. But now looking back at those days, I wish I would have just kicked my own ass out of that funk and just gotten it done already, a short run or workout, anything to get going! I could have done that back then, but I didn't. I should have, but I didn't know what I know now. Now that my day consists of work and commuting,  I have little time from when I get home to when it's bedtime. The minute I step in the door, I feel like that clock is ticking. So much to be done! Aaaand go!

My current life circumstances don't give me the flexibility to make my own schedule, so it's either waking up before the birds have stopped dreaming to get my sweat on, or come home in a mad rush and ignore everyone for at least 30 minutes to sweat, which in itself is stressful. Family dinner is important for us, so I do feel guilt (self inflicted) when everyone is waiting for me. And in case you're wondering, yes! Part of me is jealous that people can work out and run errands , be there for their kids and do things during the day other than be a corporate robot! I want to do that too! I want to run ten miles on a Tuesday and then write a sponsored post by a clothing company who has sent me products to review!  I have to buy all of my running shoes! No one sends me free shoes! Btw, I am not against free shit. I'm Asian. I love free!

Yes, I know you have demanding children who want lunch NOW, who need our attention, errands to run, appointments to makes, schedules to manage. Like I said, I get it. That was me! But it is different when you're home vs in an office building at the mercy of a hopefully understanding, but not always empathetic, manager. 
Yes, I get it. Being home with little ones is hard work. Like I said, I've done it! It was so damn hard and I swear it aged me exponentially. I'm not saying it's not, or it's not a legitimate job or that people who do it shouldn't offer advice. As parents, we should all work together to lift each other up, right? Especially us women! Let's all be supportive of one another's efforts, even if it's different than our own. I don't want anyone to think I am bashing bloggers or Stay at home parents. I'm not, I swear! I have been there, and my husband is kind of there, as he works from home but is 100% in charge of the kids when they're home.

I guess what I'm saying is, I really wish someone would give me some useful advice about my particular type of situation. I know people who do train hard, work full time outside of the house and blog, but no one really talks about how they balance all of it. Those people, what do their days look like? I want to know!

At this point in the game, I really don't expect to have it all figured out but I'm wading my way through and finding what works best for my family. Sometimes it would nice to have some company though, you know?

I'm not ripping the Stay at Home parent or blogger. Let's get that straight. I am just wishing some of these articles/posts were written by people in my similar situation.

Even a loner, antisocial person like me needs a fren every once in a while. 

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